I had a dream last night. Terik was outside mowing the lawn. I was watching him from the kitchen window. He was doing an awesome job, as he always did, he would always try to do his very best with anything he was doing. A few minutes later he came in and we started talking. It was so nice to look at him, sit by him, hold his hand and just talk. All of a sudden I realized he was not suppose to be there. He was dead. I told him so and he said "no mom, I didn't die". I told him "yes you did sweetie". He replied "no I got out just in time, I was trying to get my ball but i couldn't reach it so i jumped out of the way, i do remember feeling a little pain in my leg but it's okay now." I then saw myself looking at the track where he had died and I saw a soccer ball down between the slats of the railroad tracks. I was sad still but i was relieved by the fact that he didn't really want to die. .. he just wanted his ball. Somehow this helped me feel better. I then was back to my living room talking with him and watching him interact with his siblings. I told him how much I loved him and wished he could always stay with us. He told me he would be there even if we couldn't always see him.
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| 4 year old Terik helping Daddy mow the Lawn. |
I was so grateful to wake up this morning with peace and love in my heart. Even though I miss him terribly, it brought me peace just to be able to see him in my dream. I tried to relax and fall asleep, so that hopefully I would be able to go back into my dream again. You know how you don't want some dreams to end? So you are able to think about it a little bit and fall back asleep with the same dream? I of course did not want this dream to end but unfortunately I was not able to return to the dream.
I wonder if this dream had a real meaning? I wonder if he was trying to tell me that he didn't really want to die, he was just looking for joy (representing the ball). I know he was in so much pain and I know he found peace after this life but he wishes he wasn't dead. He wishes he could be with us again. Not at the sacrifice of taking up that sick body again though. He didn't mean to hurt us and he actually didn't even mean to die, he was just trying to stop the pain. Whether it is true or not, it brings me comfort to think that he is at peace and happy now! May you rest in peace, my precious boy, and feel of our love for you reaching up to Heaven.
Beautiful Dream! A TRUE dream. Terik was with you that night and he was telling you the truth. He didn't die and he got his ball (joy) back. He hasn't left you... he is still there even when you can't see him. This dream is a GIFT to help you heal. You can go back into this dream any time you want by remembering it. Remember every detail you can and savor it. As you do, Terik will be with you and give you even more insights and peace and joy! This witness was given me as I read your dream. Don't you think it's interesting that it was a ball he used to describe the Joy he had lost and was seeking? A ball is no good unless there is someone else to throw or kick it to... Joy is the same way! Joy can only be present when we are sharing it with someone else! So like Terik to think of a ball! On our mission I came to know like never before, how truly thin the veil is when we "Remember" them and the Joy! Thank you for sharing this beautiful dream Sweetheart!! It is true.
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